Wednesday, May 6, 2009


Have ever wondered how to get to point A to point B in Antartica? Well, like most people you say" "Oh well, you simply cannot do that easily. It's near impossible. The snow, the lack of roads, the inclement weather." I say: "Nope!! Not so!"

I have developed the premeir way to scoot your way around in the tundra and harness natural resources.

The NicTred
Yes, I named it after myself.

This transportation device uses state of the art technology and the pure power of penguin to make your trips tooling around the Arctic much easier.


Well, the Nictred is a platform based machine that allows the passenger to stand on it while it moves. It is similar to the Segway, because the passenger just stands on it and it moves. How does it move? Penguin power of course!

The penguin lives in the bowels of the treds and runs on a track (similar to that movie but minus the death) which propels the device.

The Nictred tops speeds up to 15mph and 20mph in mating season.

Below is a similar device. There would not be any missile launcher's on the NicTred. This is a spec for North American college campus'.

*Please note a lot of space for penguin or other animals to scurry their hearts out.
We see here the speediness of the penguin and its Biblical tendencies, a great choice for transportation in one of the world's most undiscovered wonders.

The Nic tred will also be available in cheetah:

Available in warm climates or if you really want to get somewhere fast in Antartica..possibly if a glacier is collapsing.

The Nic Tred...getting you where you want to go


  1. What happens when the animals in question have to use the bathroom? Do they just go in there and then when the wheel rotates it covers them in their own urine and feces? We need to think about these things :)

    Also, I think you need to change your time zone on your profile because it says you posted this at 9:53 AM and thus put it under my entry instead of above it :(

  2. Also, I think the Nic-Tred could be helpful to penguins--they have to walk such long distances to get food because of global warming. Some of them starve to death on the trip there and back. So the Nic-Tred could help them get to their own destinations quicker and eat food and not die.

  3. Diapers. That is how the animals will survive the trip without getting covered in their own excrement.

  4. Excrement, Sch...rexcrement....

    We have polar bears to worry about! So obviously, my question is, will the penguins be armed? will there be Emperor penguins? Will they wear hard hats?

    That said.... The Nic-Tred... is the future.

  5. Oh one other thing - Katy are you going to use this in your article research? cutting edge.... I'm just saying

  6. i just noticed... that penguin is Jesus.